Food Journal - Wednesday

Egg Sandwich (egg, bagel thin, 2% cheese) - 5 pts

WW Yogurt - 1 pt
Carrot Sticks - 0 pts

Wahoo's Blackened Fish Taco, Black Beans, Brown Rice - 9 pts

Dark Chocolate/Almond Candy - 2 pts
Plum - 1 pt

Turkey Mac - 6 pts

Skinny Cow Mint Ice Cream Sandwich - 3 pts

Total - 27 pts

Note - Walked for about 30 minutes pushing the stroller this evening.  WW tells me this is worth 1 point.  Stingy bastards.

Food Journal - Tuesday

Smoothie (protein powder, yogurt, spinach, strawberries, 1/2 banana) - 5 pts

6 in Subway roasted chicken breast sandwich - 6 pts
salt and vinegar chips - 5 pts

Iced coffee - 3 pts

Lentil-Sausage Casserole (so good!) - 6 pts

WW ice cream bar - 2 pts

Total - 27 pts

Food Journal - Monday

Egg Sandwich (egg, cheese, bagel thin) - 6 pts

EAS Shake - 2 pts
Banana - 2 pts

Turkey Mac - 6 pts
Salad (lettuce, spinach, tomato, yogurt ranch) - 2 pts

Carrot sticks - 0 pts
Fiber One bar - 2 pts

Lean Pocket - 6 pts
Plum - 1 pt

WW ice cream bar - 2 pts

Total - 29 pts

Walked - 1 hr

Menu Plan Monday

Breakfast Options
Egg Sandwich
Smoothie
Yogurt and bagel
Nutrigrain Waffles
Breakfast Cookies

Lunch Options
Lean Cuisines (two left!)
Can of high fiber soup
Leftover turkey mac
Leftover Lentil-Sausage Casserole
Chef Salad
*Out for lunch Wednesday and Saturday

Dinner Plan
Monday - Leftover turkey mac wiith salad
Tuesday - Lentil-Sausage Casserole with salad
Wednesday - Leftover Lentil-Sausage Casserole with salad
Thursday - Out for dinner
Friday - Out for dinner
Saturday - Pancakes and eggs with fruit

Snacks
WW 1 and 2 point bars
Fruit
Edamame
EAS shakes
Mini pretzels
Yogurt
Fiber One Bars
Sees Suckers
Carrot Sticks
Zucchini Slices
Trail Mix

My number one goal for this week is to spend less money on food.  I know, I know - not evident by the number of times I am eating out, but those were previously arranged plans.  My grocery list for the week is relatively short and includes some Joey's staples that we seem to be out of (cheese sticks, ham/turkey, frozen veggies).  Let's see if I can get out of the grocery store for less than $50.

Food Journal - Sunday

Coffee with FF half & half - 0 pts

Steamed dumplings - 3 pts
Udon - 5 pts
Cabbage salad with dressing - 2 pts

Chips and guacamole - 5 pts

Carnitas tacos - 12 pts
Beans - 5 pts

Frozen yogurt with white chocolate chips - 5 pts

Total - 37 pts

See?  I told you Sundays are bad . . .

Food Journal - Saturday

Bagel Sandwich (bagel thin, turkey, WW cream cheese) - 5 pts
2 cups Coffee with FF Half & Half - 1 pt

WW yogurt - 1 pt
Mini pretzels - 2 pts

Turkey Mac (ground turkey, macaroni, spaghetti sauce) - 6 pts
1 T 2% sharp cheddar

Skinny Cow Mint Ice Cream Sandwich - 3 pts

Total - 18 pts

Note - I try not to make a habit of being so far under my points target for the day, but it was sick day around here and food just wasn't that high on my list of priorities.  It should all balance out over the course of the week, though.  Sundays are usually a bit of a disaster as far as eating goes.

Food Journal - Friday

Egg Sandwich (egg, bagel thin, 2% cheese) - 5 pts

Sushi Lunch (shared rainbow/caterpillar roll, edamame, miso soup) - 10 pts

EAS Shake - 2 pts

Homemade chilaquiles (egg, corn tortillas, 2% cheese, taco sauce) - 8 pts

WW Dark chocolate Raspberry Bar - 2 pts

Total - 27 pts

Side note:  Have you had those Weight Watchers Dark chocolate Raspberry Bars?  OMG.  Heaven.  Pure heaven.

Let's Try This Again

I'm not even going to get into how many times I say this.  It's been way too emotional of a year to worry about addressing my long term issues with eating right now.  I started counting my points again yesterday.  As of that morning, I am pretty much at my original starting point.  I'll count it as a small victory that I'm not up at all.

I did decide that I'm going back to journaling what I eat here.  As someone recently pointed out, it's my blog and it really doesn't matter if my eating habits aren't interesting to the world.  It's what will work for me - for now at least.  I'm sure it won't last long given my diet ADD.

Anyway, I'm back.  For now.

Struggling

At some point last week, I think I fell off the wagon.  Hard.  So much so that I am already dreading my WW meeting this week.  I have got to find the motivation to get back on track.  I haven't been drinking my water, counting my points or exercising.  Ugh, it's bad.

In the past, I have always allowed myself to wait until the new WW week to start over.  I think I can't do that this time around.  I just need to stop eating everything in sight and start fresh tomorrow (I'm done eating for today).  I had set myself a pretty lofty goal for next week, but I'm going to let that go effective immediately.  There's no point in messing up my motivation again when I don't achieve said goal.

This past week is living proof that I am a chronic emotional eater.  My week went downhill rapidly last Wednesday when I came home to a flood.  I really need to find healthier ways to deal with my feelings.  Suggestions?

McFatty Monday: Measuring Success

Whenever I attempt to lose weight, I struggle with knowing what my actual goal weight is.  According to Weight Watchers, I have about 70 pounds to lose.  To get to where I was at my most in shape EVER (sophomore year in high school), I would need to lose 50.  To get to where I was when I started dating my husband, I'd need to lose about 30.  And to get to where my doctor says I should be, I'd need to lose about 20.

The problem is that I have been overweight for a long time.  That combined with the fact that I am built pretty solidly (so I weigh a lot more than people realize) makes it hard to settle on an "ideal weight".  I want to be comfortable in my clothes.  I would prefer than those clothes be a smaller size.  I want to feel better naked.  I want my engagement ring to fit like it did the day my husband proposed.  I want to wear sleeveless shirts.

So whatever I have to lose to make all that happen would be great.  For now, I am going to focus on one weigh in at a time.  Weeks that I lose weight I will consider successful and weeks that I don't I will consider less than successful.  For now, my tangible goal will be to drop from a 16 to a 14 in pants (which would mean buying new pants!).  I'll wait and see how that feels before deciding what goal to set next.

Baby steps, right?

Friday Weigh In

I was a little worried about my weigh in this week because Wednesday and Thursday had not been good eating days.  Or exercise days, for that matter.  It was fine, though.  I was down 1.4 pounds from two weeks before.  2.6 pounds total in 4 weeks.

I was a little bummed about that until I remembered (actually, Sal reminded me) that I had lost 5 pounds before I even started to WW.  So that's over 7 pounds in a little less than 6 weeks.  Not too shabby.

I've gotten out of the habit of regular exercise in the last few days, but I will get back on track with that.  My mom and I walked the kid to the park this afternoon and I'm walking with a friend tomorrow morning.  After that, the weather should be all stabilized and I will be out of excuses.

Goals for this week:
Water, water, water
Track points every day
Get more sleep

WW Hearty Shepherd's Pie

This is another comfort food swap out that I tend to make A LOT.  It just so happens that it also fits in with this month's Flavor of the Month theme - BOOZY!  Normally, I don't think you can taste the alcohol in recipes, but this one you definitely can taste the red wine and I love it.

Ingredients
1 3/4 lbs potatoes, peeled and cut into 1" pieces
2/3 cup fat free milk
1 tbsp butter
1 tsp salt
1/4 tsp pepper
1 lb lean ground beef (4%)
1 onion, chopped
4 cloves garlic
1 tsp dried oregano
1/2 c dry red wine
2 tbsp tomato paste
1 pkg frozen peas and carrots
1 pkg sliced mushrooms
1 cup beef broth

• Directions

1.  Preheat oven to 350F.  Spray a 2-quart baking dish with nonstick spray.

2.  To make topping, place the potatoes in a large pot with enough cold water to cover by 3 inches; bring to a boil.  Cook until the potatoes are fork-tender, 10-12 minutes.  Drain; return the potatoes to the pot.  Add the milk, butter, 1/2 tsp of the salt, 1/8 tsp of the pepper; mash with a potato masher and set aside.

3.  Meanwhile, to make the filling, heat a large nonstick skillet over medium-high heat.  Add the beef and cook until browned, about 5 minutes, breaking it apart with a wooden spoon.  Transfer to a bowl.  Return the skillet to the heat.  Add the onion, mushrooms, garlic, and oregano; cook, stirring occasionally, until the onion is lightly browned and mushrooms are soft, about 5 minutes.  Add the wine and tomato paste; stirring occasionally, until the mixture is slightly thickened, 1-2 weeks.  Add peas and carrots; stirring occasionally, until the vegetables thaw, 1-2 minutes.  Stir in the broth and cook until the mixture is slightly thickened, 3-4 minutes.  Stir in the beef and the remaining 1/2 tsp salt and 1/8 tsp pepper.

4.  Transfer the filling to the baking dish.  Spread the topping over the filling and bake until the filling is bubbly around the edges, about 20 minutes.  Remove the pie from the oven.  Increase the oven temperature to broil and broil the pie, 5 inches from the heat, until the topping is lightly browned, 1-2 minutes.  Let stand 5 minutes before serving.

Makes 6 servings, 5 WW points per serving.

Notes:  Recipe adapted from Weight Watcher's Best Eats cookbook.  The only thing I changed was adding mushrooms.  I just happen to like them.  Leave them out if you don't (Erin).  Also, if you don't eat beef (Dani), this is equally yummy with ground turkey or ground pork.

McFatty Monday: Cheating

My uncle's funeral was Friday.  That was a problem for a couple of reasons.

1.  It was at the same time as my Weight Watchers meeting.
2.  There was food after.  Lots of food.

I have no idea what the last week looked like in terms of weight loss because I am weird and refuse to attend a meeting that's not "my" meeting.  According to my BFF the Wii Fit, I am down a little over a pound but I have no idea what the difference is between that and the scale at my WW meeting.

And as far as the food on Friday?  Well, it was bad.  I had a sandwich, several kinds of fried chicken, macaroni salad, chips and guacamole, and MANY margaritas.  After all that was done, I went with my hubs and sister to try out a new restaurant we had heard about.  Believe it or not, the best option (calorie-wise) on the menu was a burger.  I split one with Sal and a Guinness Milkshake with my sister.  Both were heavenly, but who knows how many points I consumed by the time that day was over.

 I'm blaming it on Uncle Frank.  This week will be better.

Getting Active

The focus at last week's Weight Watchers meeting was exercise.  The challenge presented was to do a minimum of 10 minutes of activity each day.  Ten minutes hardly seemed worth the effort to me so I bumped it up to 30 with the realization that might not happen EVERY day.  Well, with the help of my new BFF, the Wii Fit, it is happening every day.

I forgot how much fun it can be to jump on every morning and do balance tests and wait in suspense for my Wii Fit age that day.  And honestly, I break a sweat doing most of the activities on there - sometimes it just takes a while.  I'm pretty sure it's not the key to becoming ripped, but at this point anything that motivates me to move is a good thing, right?

The Beck Diet Solution tells me I need to give myself credit, so I will just mention here that I spent 70 minutes working out today on the Wii Fit and also took a 50 minute walk on my lunch break.  Take that, 10 minute challenge!

We Need a Schedule

In case anyone was wondering, I have not abandoned The Beck Diet Solution, I just haven't had the time or energy to blog about every step. I did get a little behind, but I am catching up now. 

I wanted to talk about one topic that really made me stop and think, though. Day 8 has to do with accepting that dieting takes time and energy and committing to devoting a little of both eat day. To that end, I made myself a couple of skeleton schedules (one for work day and one for non-work days) to use as jumping off points. By no means do I think I will stick to these exact plans (ever), but it is kind of nice to see how you can fit things into your day with a little bit of foresight.

Work Days 
0600 - Up/Indoor exercise
0700 - Get ready for work
0730 - Breakfast/leave for work
0800 - Work
1000 - Morning snack
1200 - Walk
1300 - Lunch at my desk
1500 - Afternoon snack
1630 - Leave work
1800 - Dinner
1830 - Bedtime Routine for Joey
1900 - Cleanup and prep for next day
1930 - Free time
2100 - Bed

Non-work Days
0600 - Up/Indoor Exercise
0800 - Breakfast
1000 - Walk/Cooking/Nap
1200 - Lunch
1400 - Walk/Cooking/Nap
1800 - Dinner
1830 - Bedtime Routine for Joey
1900 - Cleanup and prep for next day
1930 - Free time
2100 - Bed

You can see that both schedules follow roughly the same pattern which is because I have found that I struggle a lot less with my eating when I stick to a schedule that includes regular snacks. Also, Joey tends to be a lot more cooperative when I can keep his schedule pretty consistent.  I'll let you know how it goes.

McFatty Monday: Comfort Food

In this week, Blair talks about using food for comfort.  This is something I have always done and it's most of the reason I am over 200 pounds.  I only gained about 15 pounds when I was pregnant with my son so I'm not one of those people that can blame baby making for extra weight.

I've spent a lot of time thinking about this and I came to the conclusion that I will probably always seek comfort in food to some extent.  So the trick for me is to find substitutes for comforting foods.  That's easier for me than for some because when I think comfort food, I am thinking savory things like mac and cheese, chicken pot pie, and enchiladas.  I don't think modifications are as easy with sweet stuff.

Which brings me to the OTHER amazing thing I made the other night - a Weight Watchers recipe.

[Image Source and Recipe]

This pot pie is so good.  It has thyme in it which I think gives it a really interesting flavor.  And altogether, it only takes about an hour to put together and bake.  All of the ingredients are super easy to come by, too.

The other cool thing about this recipe is that the base for the sauce and the "crust" (which is really just low fat crescent rolls) could be used with a bazillion other things.  I am thinking I might do lean ground beef with mushrooms and onions as the filling the next time around.  Or WW suggest switching out the traditional mixed veggies called for by the recipe for Asian veggie mix to give it a whole other feel.  Can't wait to try both of those.

I think this meal will become a staple around here because I love things that can be made ahead (this reheats really well) and can be served all in one bowl.  The cereal bowls from our stoneware set that my husband insisted we didn't need really come in handy for meals like this one.

And bonus, 1/4 of the pie is only 7.5 points!  WW suggest that a serving should be a 6th of the pie, but I have no patience for figuring out how to cut it into 6 pieces.  It's worth the extra 2.5 points to me to have more food and not deal with that stress.

Heaven in a Pyrex Dish

I made these for dessert tonight and they were AMAZING.  If they weren't 4 points each, I would probably have eaten them all.  I got this recipe for Best of My Lava Chocolate Cakes from Hungry Girl.  I am always a little leery of her recipes because they seem to call for a lot of things I don't have on hand (in weird quantities) and some (like this one) have a lot of steps.  These were worth it, though.  And almost all of the ingredients called for I can use for other things.

I followed Hungry Girl's recipe for these exactly (except I used regular sized chocolate chips) so you can get the recipe here.

WW Weigh In - Week 2

I was down 4 pounds at this week's weigh in!  I was so excited when they told me that.  I almost jumped up and down.  It means only 1.2 pounds total, but that's over half a pound a week and I'll take it.

Things I did right this week:

• Tracked my point everyday.  Even the bad one.
• Squeezed as many "filling foods" into every day as possible.
• Drank my water most days.
• Walked one day (stupid rain).

Things I need to work on next week:

• Water every day.
• 30 minutes of exercise a day, most days.
• Take my vitamins.
• Plan my week.

It's so funny.  Every time I have a week like this, I remember why I love WW.  Following the plan really is easy and it works.  When I'm not following the program, it's easy to convince myself that it really doesn't work or that I can do fine by just "watching what I eat".  Um yeah, I didn't get to be over 200 pounds by "watching what I eat".  Or maybe I did.  Either way, it's a bad plan.

Breakfast for Dinner

It was kind of a big deal to have breakfast for dinner when I was a kid.  My dad HATED breakfast for dinner (with the possible exception of chorizo and egg burritos) so we were only allowed to have it on the rare occasions that he wasn't home for dinner.  I was thinking about that this afternoon after reading this post on Big Red Kitchen about dinner for breakfast.(which is a whole "thing" I never knew about but makes total sense) and then I needed it.

All the way home I thought about what to make.  Eating was a bit of a challenge today so I needed to keep my points to a minimum.  I figured I would just scramble some eggs with veggies and ham because that's also something my kid loves, but then I remembered I had these in my fridge.

[image source]

These wraps are kind of like whole wheat tortillas, but more durable.  They're pretty tasty if you don't mind the whole graininess of them.  The kid likes all things whole wheat (weird) so he thinks they're pretty yummy, too.

And the best part o this whole thing is that the wrap, an egg, two egg whites, ham, mushrooms, salsa and a little grated cheese only set me back about 4 points.  Now I have points left for dessert.

Scale Obsessed

Disclaimer:  This is not my scale OR my weight.  Image source.

I am cannot stop weighing myself this week.  I'm not sure what's up with that because it's not normal for me.  Every time I walk down the hall, I stop in the bathroom to get on the scale.  It's all different times of day and in all different states of dress so it's not like the numbers are comparable at all.  What is my deal?

I know there are tons of different theories on weighing yourself so this might be okay by some standards, but for me it usually is the first step down a bad path.  It always starts out like this and then spirals into thinking it doesn't matter what I eat because my weight pretty much stays the same.

I think I need to get out of this house.  Thank goddess my cold is mostly better today so I can go back to work before the scale ruins all my hard work.  Friday is my official weigh in day.  I promise not to get back on ANY scale until then.

McFatty Monday

It's raining today.  And both boys are home.  That will be my excuse for not exercising TODAY.  I'm really good at the game where you find reasons not to move.

We are expecting 4-8 inches of rain in SoCal this week so walking isn't going to be an easy feat.  I am just going to have to set myself a goal of doing something every day this week.  If I don't walk, I will Shred or maybe go spend some quality time with the treadmill in our fitness center.  I suppose it also wouldn't kill me to get back in the swing of yoga.

Finding time to exercise is always a challenge for me.  If I could get up earlier in the morning, I would be able to do sit then, but it's so hard to do that.  My only times right now where exercise is even an option are my lunch break and after the kid goes to bed.  Once it starts staying light later, after picking up the kid will be an option, too, especially since I just found a great walking path for us to visit.

Looking back on last week's goals, I:

• Had one soda at home (and only one out which is huge for me considering the shitastic week I had)
• Didn't get my water in most days
• Counted my points most days
• Didn't shred.  Not even once.
• Walked every day I was at work - WIN!

This week's goals are:

• 10 meals consisting only of WW filling foods (this is the WW challenge of the week)
• Do something physical everyday
• Drink 64 ounces of water each day
• Continue to track my points
• Get more sleep

For more links to McFatty Monday posts, go here.

::sigh:: It's Saturday

It's been a ridiculously long week.  My weekly weigh in at Weight Watchers didn't go well, but in my own defense I had a surprise vacation and a death in the family to navigate this week.  I was up 2.8 pounds.  It's not the end of the world, by any stretch of the imagination, but it's hard to be motivated when faced with an almost 3 pound gain.

That said, I am back on track beginning today.  Days at home are always good for getting myself refocused because there really aren't many temptations around.  And as much as I would have liked to crawl in my bed and stay there for a week, I have been making myself walk as often as possible.  I generally let my husband off the hook for that, but I think starting this week, he's going to be given the option of staying home alone or coming with us.

We are also working on a menu for the coming week so that we can keep our shopping focused and prevent buying things we don't need on our weekly shopping trip.  We have both been trying to avoid soda as much as possible (I've had two since Monday afternoon) and bread as well.  I'm not exactly sure of the reasoning there, but I figured it couldn't hurt.  Should also save us some money in the long run.

Anyway, this week will be better.  It has to be.

McFatty Monday

So this past weekend was tough.  Like really tough.

My husband took my away for a weekend in Vegas which, for us, means eating and booze.  The only good thing about this is that a lot of walking is required to get from place to place.  So we walked.  And we ate.  And we drank.  And then we walked so more.  I am actually sore from all the walking we did.

That said, when we hopped on the scale this evening (part of a weight loss deal we made with one another that I will talk about another time) it was not pretty.  Remember those 5 pounds I lost?  Yeah.  I seem to be carrying them around along with 4 of their friends.  Ugh.

But tomorrow is another day.  I have already packed my lunch and the husband made me some REALLY yummy lentil soup to have for dinner the next few evenings.  And to keep myself motivated, I am going to tell myself that the weight I gained while we were away was water.  It could be, right?

So my goals for this week are:

• No soda at home
• Drink at least 64 ounces of water per day
• Count my points everyday
• Start The 30 Day Shred tomorrow
• Walk at lunch as many days as possible

I should add that I did manage to continue with my work on The Beck Diet Solution which I count as a success.  More on that tomorrow.

The Beck Diet Solution, Days 4-5

Day 4
Day four is all about giving yourself credit for a job well done.  The goal is to build your confidence by giving yourself praise every time you make a good decision in your diet life.

In order to remind myself that I should be doing this, I wrote "GIVE CREDIT" on the top of my advantages card and highlighted it.  Also, I dug out a ring I haven't worn in ages that I am planning to wear on my right hand.  Since I don't normally wear much in the way of jewelry, I think this will be a fairly effective reminder.

Day 5
The focus for day five is on eating slowly and enjoying every bite.  This has been effective for me in the past, but it's hard to remember to do it.  Again, I think I am going to use the ring as a reminder.  Once I get used to that being there, I will switch it up to some other piece of jewelry or other.

When I find that I am NOT eating slowly and deliberately, I will stop, put my fork down and begin taking drinks between bites.  This method has always worked for me in the past.

Side note:  It turns out that Prior Fat Girl is using a different version of this book so what I am doing isn't quite going to match up with what she's blogging about.  I'm okay with that, but I thought I should point it out.

Have You Tried This??

Um, wow.

You kind of have to love mousse like I do to "get" this stuff, but it's so good if you do.  It's airy, chocolatey goodness that I will most likely dream about tonight.

There are apparently a couple other flavors (one dark chocolate and one caramel) that I can't wait to try next.  And the best thing about them?  They are ONE point.  Seriously, Jello doesn't get any better than this.

Totally makes up for the bell peppers and carrots that were my snack this afternoon.

Progress Report

Today some friends and I tried out a new Weight Watchers meeting.  I was kind of set on not attending meetings, but everyone else was doing it so I figured I might as well.  If I was going to give in to peer pressure, at least it was for a good reason, right?

So since I have been watching what I eat for a week and half now, I wanted to give myself a little credit for it even though it wouldn't be reflected on my Weight Watchers tracking.  I jumped on the scale first thing this morning and was excited to see that I was down 5 whole pounds!

This is what five pounds looks like.  Can you imagine carrying this stupid box and corkscrew around all day?  Yeah neither can I, but I was.  And now I'm not.

The Beck Diet Solution, Days 1-3

You're really only supposed to do one day at a time, but I was bored in the car so I listened to the instructions for the first three days.  I think I can handle them all, though.

Day 1 
The main task for day one was to make an index card and list the advantages of losing weight.  I mostly used examples from the worksheet provided and then added one thing of my own.  I guess the idea is that you will add things as you think of them.  Here are the reasons I listed:

• I'll be happier when I look in the mirror
• I'll live longer
• I'll feel better physically
• I'll have more energy
• I'll be more physically fit
• I'll be a good example for my son

The recommendation is that you review your cards at least twice a day while trying to lose weight.  After you hit your goal, the author says you may not need to review them as often.  I actually picked 5 times of day to review mine based on the times I know I am most likely to be thinking about eating things I should.  chose:

• When I get in the car in the morning
• 10 am
• 2 pm
• When I get in the car after work
• Before bed

The book suggested that I make additional copies of your list to keep in various places.  I put one in my car and one by my bed.

Finally, I was asked to implement a reminder system.  The cards in my car and by my bed are hopefully going to serves as triggers for those times.  I also set alarms on my phone for 10 and 2.  I'm sure it's going to take me a while to get in the swing of reviewing my cards regularly, but it should only take a few seconds and Dr. Beck promises it will be worth it.

Day 2

The goal for day two is to pick a diet plan to follow and a backup plan in case the one you pick doesn't work for you or, in my case, you get bored.  That way you know what you do next and then there's no excuse for not dieting.

I chose Weight Watchers as my primary diet.  South Beach will be my back up.  I may even end up doing a little switching back and forth between them so that I can keep myself interested.  We'll see.

Day 3

The third day is about learning to sit while you eat.  The more I think about this concept, the more it makes sense.  For example, if I was at a party I might snack on things while standing around and socializing.  If I were required to sit before eating, I probably wouldn't eat anything.  It's a pretty basic concept, but will definitely require some retraining.

The day three worksheet asked what I plan to do when I feel like eating while standing.  I wrote,"Stop, read my response card (the index card that I made to give myself reasons not to stand and eat) and chose not to eat while standing."  

It also asked what I plan to do to remind myself not to stand and eat.  That one was a little tougher.  It's not like I could set an alarm for that.  I ended up writing, "Read my response card along with advantages card twice a day."  How else will I remind myself not to stand and eat?  Thoughts?

So there it is.  The first three days of The Beck Diet Solution.  Prior Fat Girl is hosting a discussion about the first 50 pages of the book on her blog today.  So far I am liking the book so I'm interested to see what others think.  

New Philosophy on Food

I was wandering around the kitchen last night trying to figure out what to feed my kid for dinner when I had a thought.  I spend copious amounts of time worrying about what goes into his body and hardly any at all thinking about what I put in mine.  I mean, I guess that's better than the other way around but still bad.

When I put together a meal for my son, it usually contains some kind of protein, a carb and a vegetable or fruit.  Even if it's something as simple as dry cereal and cup of milk with some applesauce.  I wouldn't dream of giving him something from the drive through at Jack in the Box (not most days anyway) and I certainly wouldn't have him just not eat.  So why do I think these things are okay when it's me?

Another thing I have mentioned here before is cutting out chemicals.  When Joey was first starting to eat solid food, we gave him organic baby food exclusively.  I'm really not all about the organics, but I loved knowing that the only ingredients in what he was eating were those listed on the FRONT of the jar, not a ton of extra things I had never heard of.  So why don't I think twice when I put crap into my body?

So yeah, this is my new philosophy on food.  It will probably take some easing into, but I'll get there.  One of the first things I intend to cut out is soda.  That's going to be a painful one for me but I just need to do it and move on.  I made the mistake tonight of examining the Diet Dr. Pepper I am drinking and the list of ingredients seriously made me cringe.. That's bad, right?

I think I have 6 Diet Dr. Peppers left in the fridge.  I am making it my goal for this week to leave them there.  I won't say I'm giving up soda entirely just yet, but I  will at least give it up here at home.

Good luck, self.

Diet ADD

I always say that my son has the attention span of a gnat.  He probably got that from me.  I've already decided to switch my eating plan back to Weight Watchers points.  Honestly, it's probably a much better choice considering that I can count points in my sleep.  I'm not nearly as good when it comes to calories.

I switched back today and so far it's going well.  One thing that always tripped me up about counting points is the idea that you're supposed to meet a specific goal each day.  For me, this tends to lead to eating crap that I really don't need to eat after I've had a really good eating day.  Makes me a little crazy.

One thing I have always found helps me stay on track is the Weight Watchers points counter bracelet I bought a few years ago.  Not necessarily because it helps track how many points I've eaten in a day, but because it serves as kind of an anchor.  When I notice it on my wrist, it makes me think about all the things I am working toward.  It's prevented me from ordering chili fries or nachos more than once.

The only downside of the bracelet is that it's old, made from pretty cheap materials and not that cute.  Also, they don't sell them anymore so I couldn't get a replacement if something happened to it which is highly likely since my son thinks it's great fun to pull on.

Somewhere on the internet, I got the idea to buy a knit/crochet row counting bracelet to use for this same purpose.  I ordered this one today and I'm pretty excited about it.  I don't have it yet, but when I get it and check it out a bit I will post the link to the Etsy seller.

McFatty Monday

My name is Jessica and I have a lot of weight to lose.  I refuse to put a number to it because that's just scary to me.  Instead, I will say that my goals include:

• Being able to fit in a pair of jeans with a single digit size
• Calves that fit in tall boots
• Having an ass that no longer spills over the sides of my dining room chairs
• Being comfortable in a swim suit
• Feeling thin enough to get the short hair cut I have been dreaming of

I started this blog back up again the other day and listed some other in that post.  My biggest goal is feel and be healthier.  Mommyhood is hard work so I need to have as much energy as possible.  This is my journey.  

Thanks to Blair for starting this up.  

A New Year

I started this blog in July of 2009.  The last time I posted was August 2009.  You can probably guess what that has meant for my weight loss.  A new year has always meant new resolve for me, usually with very little result.  I made a couple of changes this year that I am hoping are going to make this year the successful one.

First, I am reading The Beck Diet Solution on the recommendation of Prior Fat Girl.  Basically the premise is that people who have struggled with weight loss do so because they don't have the right tools to deal with the emotional stuff that comes into play when we diet.  The book gives you a task a day to complete and by the end of it (6 weeks), you are supposed to be equipped with an arsenal of tools to help you manage any eating situation.

Second, I am recommitting myself to a couple of exercise goals that I've had for a while.  I want to FINALLY make it through Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred and also complete the Couch-to-5K running plan. I can be either really good about exercise or really bad.  I feel so much better when I'm good about it, though.  That's something I need to keep in mind on days when I really don't want to do any.  Helping my goals along will be the fact that a group of us are walking the  the Avon Walk for Breast Cancer in San Francisco the weekend of July 10-11.  39.3 miles over two days is not a task to be taken lightly.

The last (and really, first) new thing I plan to try this week is a 7 day detox starting Monday.  No meat, no dairy, no sugar, no preservatives, no alcohol, no caffeine.  It's not going to be easy, but I think it might be just what I need to get all the cravings for holiday crap out of my system.  I have spent some time this weekend researching vegan meals that are high in protein because I always feel crappy if I don't get enough protein which is my biggest concern with this type of eating.  If I find anything good, I will post it here along with progress reports.

I know it looks like I have big plans for the coming year, but I am planning on trying to do just one thing at a time (in addition to the tasks from The Beck Diet Solution) so I don't get overwhelmed.  My biggest goal for 2010 is to get healthy for once and for all.  We're thinking we'd like to try for another baby sometime this year and I'd like to be as healthy as possible when we do that.